Monday, May 26, 2008

Shut Up and Enjoy the Ride!

We all realize that life is a process. It is a journey. Unfortunately, there are way too many people who feel like it is a destination. You will find them tirelessly out of balance and sacrificing certain elements of their lives so that they feel like they are "On their way".

When I was beginning in direct sales, I bought into the company mantra hook line and sinker. Need me to work 7 days per week? No problem. Need me to be gone from 7 am till 11 pm? No problem. The fact that I had a new baby had nothing to do with it. They would understand.

Fast forward till today. My son has a great relationship with both his mother, myself, and his step dad. All of us can easily get together and visit or grill out or whatever. However, the lesson learned is that no matter what your goal is, you need to take a time out and enjoy the ride.

A friend of mine and I were watching the thunderstorms last night and enjoying the evening immensely. "Too many people are unwilling to just shut up and enjoy the ride of life", she said. How true. Take time to tell those around you that they are loved. Mend a relationship, write a book, learn to play an instrument, go do something with your kid that you may not care about but they love. This is the true essence of life isn't in the amount of time that we put in. It is the quality of the memories that we create for ourselves and those around us.

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Tuesday, May 20, 2008

This One Will Upset Some

"I want just enough to get by..." says one person. "I just want to feel a little better..." mentions another, "Just a little more money..." All of these comments are not only hideous in their direction and focus; they are a slap in the face of God. OK, I realize I just ticked a few of you off on that one. Deal with it. We never make change unless we are a bit uncomfortable.

I was in church the other day when it dawned on me that unless we ask for all that we can have, we will not get it. (The specific answer I received when talking about revenue was "Add another 2 zeros to the end of your income goal") Guess what? Many people would tell you that the pie is only so big, that we are being greedy. There was a Presidential candidate who was telling us the other day that we couldn't drive whatever we wanted and have our heat set at what we wanted because it might upset some idiot half way across the world. Those of you 30 years old and older may remember this type of mindset FROM JIMMY CARTER!

We can be, do, and have whatever we want. We don't need to ask permission of anyone; other than to make sure that it somehow benefits others. Guess what? I don't want to drive a roller skate with a weed eater motor on the back. The damn thing would hit a butterfly and put me in the hospital. When I'm driving something, I want to win if I'm in a wreck. Is it greedy for me to ask for more money? No way! I can employ a ton more people by spending $100 in my community than sending that $100 off to DC where they will send me back $17.

My challenge to you is this: raise the level of your expectations. You will receive it. In order to do this, you will have to shatter some limiting beliefs. In my live seminars I will have participants write down all of their limiting beliefs on a pine board. They then MAKE THE DECISION that those beliefs don't benefit them anymore and smash through it with their hand. Here is the key: it only hurts if you don't break the board. It also only hurts if you hang on to garbage beliefs.

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Saturday, May 17, 2008

What are Your Rules for Happiness

I get to see such a cross section of people in my travels. Some people have seemingly miserable outlooks and attitudes when they appear to have everything in the world going for them. Yet, others seem to be down on their luck. When 90% of the people would be calling it "rock bottom"; they are happy and excited.

I have found that many people need a ton of excuses for success. One of the clients who I worked with on a personal coaching level said that they felt they were a failure because his company's stock didn't hit it's target earnings. It fell short by 2 cents. Never mind that this company realized fabulous growth over the last 2 years and this person was a millionaire many times over. His need to be happy was just too high. (After a bit of mental floss, he realized that everything was far beyond OK. He just needed a little "wake up call")

Don't base your happiness upon society's standards, make it yours. Visit a pediatric oncology ward. There you will find kids who are suffering from cancer and many won't make it until Christmas. Yet, they are cracking up laughing at the way the light shimmers off of the green Jello they are eating for lunch! What a great life lesson.

Here is my recommendation:
1. Lower your expectations to be happy. I'm not saying "Don't reach for the stars"; rather, I would encourage you to celebrate the journey of your life every step of the way.
2. Model others who have accomplished what you desire. This will cut your learning curve way down.
3. Attend one of my live programs. Visit for my schedule. I don't even know where I will be at on a day to day basis; but all of the public events are highlighted with a link to purchase tickets.

Celebrate the day!

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

What is Your Reach?

"It doesn't matter what I do" is one of the comments that drives me insane. Many people don't realize the importance of their reach. This comment usually comes from people who have very little self esteem. One of the casualties of the 1980s and 1990s is the "Let's build the kid's self esteem first" idea. Here is a newsflash for you: You cannot build someone else's self esteem. This is only accomplished by completing something.

If you don't think that what you do matters, take a moment of personal reflection on your life. Chances are you are in life due to the words or beliefs of someone else. Many people are paralyzed by the beliefs of a negative spouse, parent, teacher, or other person who had no darn business telling you what to do with your life.

My challenge to you is this: TODAY- Reflect on where you are and what negative beliefs you may possess. Make the decision that today is a new day and you will no longer be held captive to these beliefs.

Also, find 5 people to encourage today. This may be commenting on someone's new hair style, thanking the mailman, or simply smiling at a stranger. This is one of the most lucrative ways to pay the gift of life forward.

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